Wednesday, April 15, 2009

B & P 10: Aging Presenters, Music Blogs & Definitions

Hollywood, Ko… True Love, Ni… (in mixed English)
This is Naughty Eyes reporting live from the Hollywood Hills in California… OK, let me cut out the crap. I am really in Lagos (I’m loving this entertainment capital of Naija sha. With a well-positioned TV antenna, a generator and a gossipy neighbourhood, who really needs cable TV?)
So why did I start off with the California bit? Well, I saw an edition of Kenny and Dayo’s Primetime Africa show on TV recently where the (aging) presenters decided to showcase the video of Kelly Hansome’s True Love. Contrary to certain opinions, me and Kelly Bros no get wahala. Na Keke and D-1 dey vex me this time.
According to the duo, the said video was shot quote, in the Hollywood Hills in California and features the beautiful Nollywood actress, Stephanie Okereke, unquote. Na so I just balance well-well hoping to see my ex-fantasy babe play love with KH on TV. Instead Keke and D-1 just fall my hand seriously.

Guys! C’mon!! Since when did shooting a video somewhere in Enugu or wherever and adding external video clips showing aerial views of Hollywood equals to shooting the music video in Hollywood? Even me wey never go Film school sef sabi the editing trick them use for the video. Stop playing with our intelligence abeg!
To even spoil matters more, the much-touted Stephanie Okereke’s appearance consists of inserted footage from one of her recent movies, not that she featured in the music video per se! Nothing actually concerns her and Kelly Hansome in that video.
Ironically I’m really feeling Kelly Hansome on that track but to further add sand-sand to the garri, some people are accusing Kelly Boy of borrowing heavily from two of Tuface Idibia’s tracks: True Love and If Love Is A Crime. And annoyingly, KH never seems to be able to do a song without resisting the mention of Control Numbers in the lyrics.
To the Primetime “twins”, I did say this before: If your artiste doesn’t have enough money to shoot in the United States or UK or them no gree grant una visa, kindly try the cheaper South Africa option (you can ask Bigiano). This “Cut and Paste” no be am oh so you guys abeg, kindly drop the pretences and just let us enjoy good music videos, OK?

No, this isn’t Complex Algebra 101. It’s just an addition to the small but growing roll-call of A-list celeb Naija bloggers.
That’s right! MI a.k.a. Jude Abaga launched his blog a while back and it really looks promising with the 411 on his interviews, magazine covers, future shows and album launches.
MI’s foray into blogging is yet another acknowledgement of the fact that entertainers nowadays need to connect with their fans one-on-one and not just be content with album launches, shows and Radio and magazine interviews.
Here’s hoping that he has the momentum to keep up with his blogging even after his website is launched which he says will come fully on-stream anytime soon.
Speaking of his albums, expect as many lyrics to his Talk About It album as you want (better yet, request any of them and I’ll put it up for you) and a review of Illegal Music once I can lay my hands on it. You can click on the link above to scope the blog out or check out our new “Groupie Love Section” blogroll on the right.

The definition of “NotJustOK” on their blog says it all and these guys sure are nothing close to the ordinary. Co-run by Mola G and Ovie O. a.k.a. *O.O*, this Typepad-hosted blog (as far as I can tell) showcases the newest joints from artistes mostly of Nigerian origin and it’s not just about the songs either because you even get to see album covers, artistes’ wallpapers and photos and watch the latest videos as soon as they drop!
How these guys get their stuff hot off the press and manage to update everyday really beats my imagination and on the strength of this alone they deserved to have won at the NBAs if it had a purely music blog category. Methinks they ought to run a cable channel of their own or something!
They also have a Facebook presence too so if you’re an FB fan, you can chill out with these guys there.
One trial will surely convince you and after that you’ll never settle for anything that’s JustOK

Something To Add To Your Dictionary
It’s official! I’m bored… Here are the latest entries in the Blogville Dictionary of Online Ninglish (pirated copy)

1. ne-mes-me-rize:
Main Entry: nemesmerize
Function: transitive verb
Inflected Form: - ized; -iz-ing
Derived From: charizing [Origin: Temite (I think…)]
Date: 2008

Definition: 1. to subject to nemesmerism
2. nemesmerism - to give exclusive mention to a blog, blogger, media, event or extra fly website on the Media Nemesis blog

Application: If I grant exclusive mention to you in a post, then consider yourself nemesmerized!

2. LMYO (or any other such derivations):
Main Entry: LMYO
Function: verb
Derived From: Woomie’s comments [Origin: Qube (I think…)]
Date: 2009

Definition: 1. L(aughing) M(y) Y(ansh) O(ff)
Application: (Commenting after reading this hilarious post) ROTFLMYOPIMPKTFWTFME

Ok parry people, it’s time to go. In the words of a certain Ure’s estranged husband, “I sign out now!” as I go looking for something more serious to blog about.

XOXO (whatever that means…)

PS: Special shout outs to Olowo (for giving me the 411 to the M.I. blog via her “Followers” section) and to SSD (for the NotJustOK connection through her “Nigeria vs. The African Continent” music series). It’s remarkable the ways we run into some very magnificent blogs through other bloggers, don’t you think?

PPS: (Ever expanding) list of bloggers who previously had no idea what “PS” means: Afrobabe and Buttercup… At least they were gracious enough to admit it! By the way, Afrobabe’s terrorist post cracked me up like mad especially her efforts at dodging MI5. Who would have thought that behind all that sexiness lay a natural comedienne!

PPPS: I going to give 5 million Pounds sterling (Biafran) to whosoever can tell me the meaning of ROTFLMYOPIMPKTFWTFME. And yes, LG, you may use a Lifeline…


L-VII said...

Those two need to go sit down, keke and whatever they are called, so does dj jimmy jatt, these old men need to stop tryna be in control of youth culture. It annoys me, they cannot let young people have their own thing without tryna be all be in it.



I love

How far?

LG said...

buhahahahahahahaha my lof' so na me like 'biafran pound sterling pass shebi???? no let awon 'massob hear o :)

now as per the question'
the answer is

BSNC said...

those two need to chill and give other people the spot light. no mind them, they no dey try at all..

lol so thats what lMYO means. i had no idea



rolling on the floor, laughing my yansh out, peeing in my pants, kicking the floor with the.....

okay i give up

Buttercup said... i have to look out for that video!

MI has a blog? cooooool..

lol @ the new words..yes o, what the hell does 'p.s.' mean???

i wont even attempt tryna figure out what that lengthy acronym stands for..not with the reward u r giving for it sef..mscheew

SHE said...

Those two guys are on injury time right now.
They have looooonnnggg overstayed their scanty welcome.

Naughty Eyes said...

@ Everyone: Inasmuch as I agree with all you guys, age isn't REALLY an issue here (these two are kids agewise where Larry King for instance is involved). My main issue with them is their near-sightedness in running their entertainment programmes in exactly the same (unattractive) format for so many donkey years hoping the typical Nigerian viewer is dumb enough to accept their media statements as gospel. Injection of young blood would definitely nurture fresh ideas, improve on their creativity (or lack thereof) and enable them reconnect with an audience much younger than the ones they started with in the 90's.
So there!

Naughty Eyes said...

@ SSD: I love NotJustOk too. Those guys surely deserve an award.

@ LG: Shebi I try for the reward? Wetin be your answer nah?

@ BSNC: Kai! You try well-well!! Anyway, KTFWTFME means "kicking the furniture wiping tears from my eyes". Now you owe ME a million pounds (Sterling)!

@ BC: By now I trust you know what PS is right? By the way, I've learnt how to embed videos (YAY!!! THanks H2O) so please watch it an let me know if my judgements were wrong...

@ SHE: I agree... in a way... (see previous comment)

BSNC said...

lol wow i tried oo. er okay i ll mail the money to you :)

Woomie O! said...

hey! there's a new one LWKMD; Laugh Wan Kill Me Die!!!

Update p-l-e-a-s-e!

Buttercup said...

the 3 of u have been tagged!

StandTall-The Activist said...

You have said it all KEKE and D1 are ageing presenters. They need to hand over and manage stuff behind the scene...

XOXO means Hugs and Kisses.

I dnt knw what PS and PPS or PSS means o.

Naughty Eyes said...

@ BSNC: Still waiting for the money oh! Abi e don loss for road?

@ Woomie: Thanks for increasing my dictionary. So, LWKYD eh? As for an update, just did...

@ BC: I can't say for the other 2 oh, but I'll be giving tags a break for some time to come.

@ Standy: Yeah, that about summarises it.
Thanks for breaking down XOXO for me. But wait oh, X means hugs and O means kisses abi?
And lest I forget,

PS (Postscript): gist after the main gist
PPS (Post-postscript): gist after the gist after the main gist
...and so on and so forth...