Bits And Pieces 3: Hedonism and Other Stories…

Much Better Drama
In as much as I dismissed Mr. Wale Adenuga’s ongoing series of Super Story, I must say the current editions of his family drama, “This Life” titled “Hands of a Stranger” are far better. Of course there’s still the issue of the plastic acting especially on the part of the rich man’s daughter (for example, she spends a whole weekend in a hotel with the Doctor guy and yet gets so blown away when he kisses her good night as if its their first kiss). And please, I need some corrections on this. Does the CBN building in Abuja also house a hotel? One would have thought whoever was in charge of Still Photography / Locations would have done better by using an outside shot of the Hilton for example, when depicting a hotel than the CBN building.

Apart from that, the other characters are just as good as one can expect from WAP and PEFTI and the storyline of a doctor forced to choose between his devoted girlfriend and a rich man’s daughter who promises him his own hospital is of fine quality too. Can’t figure out what I’m yakking about? “Hands of a Stranger” is worth watching so catch it on NTA on Tuesday evenings.

Even better is Femi Kayode and Greg Odutayo’s “Edge of Paradise” another family drama based on a typical middle-class family called the Anyanwus made up of a Software Engineer father, a teacher mother and the politically-acceptable population of three children. It deals with family matters like child upbringing and education, love and morality, fidelity and growing up issues. My best character? The hot teenage daughter who’s facing issues of her developing sexuality and her attraction to guys.

“Edge of Paradise” shows on the NTA on the same Tuesday nights.

Kelly “Not So” Hansome
There’s something about music videos that makes me never seem to get enough of them but recently I’m seriously tempted to redefine what videos I get to see or not. Don’t get me wrong, its not the excessive amounts of booty-shaking that gets done on the TV that’s getting me upset nor the quality of the videos themselves which as I pointed out in an earlier post are actually getting better. But as I said then: “…The trend is beginning to look like you can get away with a great music video even if the song in question is trash…”

Caught a music video by a dude called Kelly Hansome on Primetime Africa as aired on AIT on Friday 15/08 in the evening time. The wrong spelling of “Handsome” aside, the fact that the video was titled: “Mugu Don Pay” should have given me pause but it didn’t. After thoroughly enjoying the beats I was hearing, it wasn’t until a second version of the video was played that I actually listened to the lyrics of the song.

To summarize, “Mugu Don Pay” toes the lines of Olu Maintain’s “Yahoozee” in celebrating hedonism but Kelly Hansome goes a step further by compelling you to “shout Hallelujah because Mugu Don Pay”. Mr. Olu might have unconvincingly denied he was referring to the 419 lifestyle but Mr. Kelly doesn’t hide that fact one bit. As the chorus of that song goes:

Mugu don pay/ Shout Hallelujah! / Maga don pay / Shout Hallelujah/ Hallelujah (x7) Owo, kudi, ego… etc

What actually galls me is the inclusion of religious undertones to criminal tendencies. The problem is the song seems to be getting massive airplay almost akin to “Yahoozee” and many people will no doubt be rocking to the music without actually listening to what is being said. Don’t the National Film and Video Censors Board take a look at these music videos before the hit our airwaves? After all they temporarily banned Konga’s song despite the fact that artistes like D’Banj actually sing more explicit lyrics.

As for the music video in question, I’m even beginning to dislike it. It contains the same booty-shaking booty-less foreign (South African?) chicks who just copy Kelly Hansome’s money-spraying choreography without them having any idea whatsoever of what he’s singing about anyway.

Wear Your Helmet O!
No, not that one. I mean the REAL one. The Federal Road Safety Commission has launched its new safety campaigns concerning the use of helmets by okada (motorcycle) riders and their passengers and I can’t help suppressing a smile. I’m already imagining the comedy that’s sure to ensue when the law is enforced effective January 1, 2009.

I mean, how are those lovely Yoruba women going to wear that thingy over their geles when they hop on an okada to attend owambe on Saturdays? And the mental picture of their Northern counterparts wearing a helmet over their full length hijabs just cracks me up totally. Even funnier will be the Newsline-type stories that will emerge when certain passengers start accusing okada men of putting juju in the said helmets to hypnotize their unsuspecting clients into parting with their valuables. Or when someone claims they caught dandruff, ringworm, tapeworm, gonorrhea, syphilis or even HIV from sharing the same essential head gear with another thus compelling us to carry around our own personal helmets whenever we want to take a bike (just like the other personal helmets people carry around).

Then of course, there will be the usual defaulters who won’t disappoint us with their claims that they never knew of such a law when the FRSC nabs them. Nollywood movie script writers, are you ready? I can’t wait for a movie to be made of the resulting helmet saga.

Egg On My Face: They Did It Again!
Yes O! They did it again! And with a very wide margin too. Despite my misgivings about our national Under-23 football team a.k.a. Dream Team IV, those boys went out and TOTALLY steam-rolled over their opposition beating neighbouring Ivory Coast 2-0 and rubbishing Belgium with a resounding 4-1 win in the semi-finals of the ongoing Olympics football event.

Oddly enough (or should I say typically enough) I somehow managed to miss watching both matches, only catching their highlights the next morning. As you can guess, it was very embarrassing asking my fellow Nigerians what the score line was after each match.

I can’t say if Samson Siasia read my discouraging post on their previous performances in the preliminary rounds but it’s no big secret that many Nigerians doubted if the Dream Team’s efforts wouldn’t mirror the dismal performance of the rest of Team Nigeria who have consistently worked hard in crashing out of the medals table. But I was horribly wrong. Siasia’s boys are the real Team Nigeria. The rest of the contingent ought to have been called the Dream Team, or better yet, the Nightmare Team. As it is, the silver/gold won after the football finals may be our only medal at the Beijing 2008 Olympics.

My own personal highlight was listening to the semi-final commentary on radio in Yoruba (yes, Yoruba!) Despite the fact that I don’t understand that tongue, I quickly discovered that the word “Goal” means the same thing in every language especially when yelled at the top of one’s lungs. I don’t know who the commentator guy on Orisun 89.5 FM, Ile-Ife was but he sure made the experience worth listening to with his own homemade sound effects and entreaties of “ko da o! Olorun, you know” and stuff like that. The guy was virtually a marketer, coach, musician, comedian and ardent member of the Nigerian Supporters’ Club all rolled into one. Kudos!

Now let me go and prepare my boys for the Finals, jo…